Showing posts with label married life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label married life. Show all posts

Saturday, November 10, 2012

married life - how's your listening skills?

Many times I wonder if there is really some truth to that thing called "7-year itch" in marriage. I heard it is that stage when couples will purportedly experience too much familiarity with each other that would somehow cause a serious stir in their relationship. Like most people, that is not something that I look forward to happening in the next 2 years. Of course, I would like to believe that there is no such thing as a "7-year itch".

Without sounding too presumptuous, I asked someone I know who's been married for more than 20 years if she has experienced that stage of her married life, although I am aware that not all marriages/relationships are the same. She kind of told me that it's normal for couples to have differences despite the love they have for each other. She told me that right now, though, the challenges in their married life started popping up again now that her husband appears to have lost the sharpness of his hearing. Many times, their arguments stem from the partner's inability to hear accurately and would often result to misunderstandings and unhealthy communication. I told her if the partner's hearing deficiency is the only thing that's upsetting their married life, they might want to seek the help of a hearing specialist. Her husband doesn't have to go through all that difficulty of hearing especially now that there are already affordable digital hearing aids in the marketplace. I also thought that helping her husband improve his hearing abilities would help him bring back the esteem that he unconsciously lost as he tries to hide this impairment from his friends by simply not seeing or talking to them. Good to know she took my advice well and is now looking to get a hearing device as a Christmas present for the husband but only after seeing a specialist first.

An old picture of us :-)

Anyway, while reflecting on our marriage, I thought we were doing good so far as a couple of five years. Overall, there were no major fights and no major arguments - just some pretty occasional minor differences that are not even worth dwelling upon. Indeed, it takes patience, understanding and respect to keep marriage or any relationship healthy. Hearing or listening to what a husband or wife is saying is important. In fact, there are also times where you need to be a little more sensitive about the things your partner may not be telling you. I do hope to keep our marriage healthy like it is and has been. I know we can do this if we continue to support one another and to keep our spiritual life healthy. With God in our midst, I know we can remain strong and not give up on each other.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Couple's Corner: What Will I Get For Christmas?

The last time he gave me something for Christmas, it was a pair of shoes (Hush Puppies). This Christmas, I am not going to expect to get anything from him because I am already aware of what our money can or cannot buy. Anyway, it goes for him as well. Everytime I would attempt to buy him a new shirt as my gift for Christmas, he would warn me not to because we have to make ends meet first. Yes, he's not the type who would agree to buy gifts from credit card. Obviously, between the two of us, he's the more frugal and practical type.

Friday, October 29, 2010

growing old together

The good thing about married life is having someone to grow old together with - someone who can put up with you despite your imperfections. I'm happy that we've come this far. It's been three years of marriage and we cannot say for certain that we've learned enough about married life. What matters is that we're learning each day as it comes.

Inspired by Brother Mel's reminiscing post, I can't help but recall again the day we got married.



If you want to know how our love story began, here's a comic strip that a mutual friend (and ex office mate) introvertedwriter made for us.



When he asked me to marry him, he made it like a simple proposal. Nothing you will ever see on television or read from mushy novels but something you will read from simple blog posts like this. :-) To me, the mere fact that he asked me to marry him was already mushy enough for me. :-) He's a man of few words but with strong principles in life.



I'm not afraid if we go through highs and lows in life because we're facing both of them together - with the help of God who strengthens us.



And even though her tantrums can get irritating sometimes.....



I wouldn't want my married life any other way. :-)

Sunday, October 10, 2010

i'm loving my husband's humor

So, you think my husband's too serious that he can't throw in some punchlines? Well, let me prove you wrong with these two things that happened within the week.


1. I am not a singer but I love to sing. I thought my husband was already used to hearing me getting carried away with the song when his comment suddenly stopped me from belting out a song.

Husband: It's not my birthday today.
Me: I know.
Husband: Then why am I hearing a butchered pig? :-)


2. When there was power outage, we used candles to light the house because our emergency light was no longer working. I got bored waiting for the power to return so I tried to dance my boredom away by teasingly doing it in front of my husband. Hubby then exclaimed, "Where's the manager of this club? I want the dancer replaced!" Grrrr.. I hate brownouts. :-)

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

can't wait for October!

Okay. It is still September. I thought I should sing Green Day's "Wake Me Up When September Ends" because I couldn't wait for the great month of October to come! Well, there's a reason why I am looking forward to October because some time next month hubby and I will be celebrating our third year wedding anniversary! I know we still have a long way to go but hopefully with God's help we can maintain the same love and respect that we have for each other until death do us part. :-)

I am just so glad to be blessed with a really wonderful husband. Today, I looked back at what I have written about married life and I realized that nothing has really changed much. We are still the same simple couple with simple dreams. I am not getting any younger (and so does he) but I still feel the same love love love for my husband. And now that we have a toddler, I still have so much love love love.


It's been a busy September so far (and I have a really bad cold) but the song from Jason Castro "Let's Fall In Love Again" sends me a really feel good feeling today. Love is indeed contagious. So, I'd like to share this song to you guys. Hopefully, it will be a mushy Tuesday for all of you...

Monday, June 7, 2010

on hardware and hardships

What a title, hahaha!

Well, we just hit the hardware store today. My handyman husband wanted to change the oil of his motorcycle but he didn't have the tool to loosen its drain plug. Well, he desperately wanted to buy a whole set of wrench tools but we ended up buying only a piece of closed end wrench. It was so tempting to swipe the credit card to buy the whole set for him - after all, I really wanted him to have what he wished for especially because Father's Day is almost near but he didn't want me to do that because it's not really necessary to buy at the moment. When her sister was here, she gave him a monetary gift so he can buy himself some tools but my daughter almost ran out of milk and diapers and we're short of cash at that time, so off the money went to the baby's needs instead.

Now, I remember my uncle N when he said he just can't understand why many of us (including himself) would want to get married and end up having a hard time managing our finances. Well, I believe that even if you're single you'd still go through financial hardships, anyway. And if you ask me, married life is so wonderful. No amount of hardship can be so hard to face and solve when you're sharing it together, right? I also believe in the saying that "These too shall pass." Anyway, so much for these thoughts. I really hope I can save some blogging money so I can surprise hubby this month.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

the spaghetti love story

To tell you the truth, it's my husband who does much of the cooking around the house. I believe he cooks better than I do. And faster, too! If you want me to cook, you better give me a lot of time so I can do it pretty good. When husband is cooking, he would already heat the pan or start the cooking right away while he is also busy cutting, slicing or preparing the rest of the ingredients to his recipe. He's definitely an ideal home chef! As for me, I like to have everything cut, sliced or prepared ahead before I turn on the heat and get everything started.

Yesterday, when there was power interruption, I decided to make spaghetti for all of us. I thought it would be a perfect pre-Valentine's Day treat! I especially made my husband's spaghetti plate extra special by carving out small hearts by knife from the red bell pepper. I secretly carved it out when he did the errand to buy the can of spaghetti meat sauce. So, when I served him his spaghetti plate, he was like surprised to see the special hearts that were on top of his spaghetti. I guess he appreciated it but still acted like he didn't. He mustered a smile and made the nicest comment about the three hearts. He said that it looked like some caveman did it because they were perfectly carved. Yeah, right! :-)

Thursday, December 11, 2008

married life

One great thing about being married is having a partner to share your troubles with although some would say that you wouldn't also be into some kind of trouble have you not gotten married haha. I'm not saying that married life is all about troubles and problems of some sort. More than anything, marriage gives you that certain kind of happiness-- that is, if you really are meant to be married after all.

I believe it will just come to a person. And it wouldn't matter how short or how long the relationship had been going. It will just hit you. The time when you think that both of you are ready and wanted to be with each other for the rest of your lives.

In one of our conversations, my sister had asked me, "Don't you two even argue?" We argue less, but yes we do argue but we make it a point to stay out of the boiling point. Sometimes when it's close to getting a fight, one of us would opt to stay calm. I would also remember to read again mom's letter for both of us. And then I would be reminded about our happy times together. It would then be so hard to stay mad or angry at the man I chose to love and marry.

Stephen and I--we were not born rich, financially. We work to earn a living and to be able to pay for our existence. But together, as husband and wife, we are looking forward to improving our lives to create a better future for our family. And yes, as the Carpenters song goes "We've only just begun..." Our married life is way too young compared to those marriages that are already "tried-and-tested."

Hmmm, I just noticed I talk or write about my husband a lot. I usually do this everytime he's asleep. And he sleeps like a baby! I feel like joining him to bed already. So, like Cinderella, I better be in bed before the clock strikes twelve. I'm turning Sleeping Beauty now. Goodnight.

Friday, October 24, 2008

my mom's legacy

i am such a cry-baby. i cry over even the smallest of things--sad commercials, soap operas, sad movie endings, stomach cramps, etc. you can just imagine how it is going with me especially now that i am pregnant. hormones, yes, that's a good guess. or maybe i am just plainly old me!

you see, i was watching my favorite drama on tv "Iisa Pa Lamang" and i felt so bad that i could relate to the sad plight of claudine barretto's character where it got me teary-eyed. in-between commercials, i was also going through our wedding album and found my mom's letter safely kept in one of those picture holders. mommy wrote it for me and stephen the morning after our wedding. i cried again. her letter would always touch my heart even though i've re-read it several times. i realized that this was the last letter she had made for me (and hubby). it pains me still. i'm happy. i'm sad. it's always a roller coaster ride. i'm happy because i know where she is right now. in a safe place. but i'm sad, too. coz i thought she'd still be here for long. i'm looking forward to our wedding anniversary because mom was also a special part of it but it's also nearing december and that's the time we lost her last year. we never even got the chance to celebrate christmas with her. :(

going back to this letter, i would like to share this one on the internet because i'm proud of my mom. she has left me quite a legacy. this was simply written, but was definitely written from the heart.

Everdearest Joanne and Stephen,

Greetings!

You are now entering a new life of togetherness, full of hope and anticipation with all its benefits and obligations that go along with it. Trust and Pray to God alone for help that you both and your future children can triumph over trifles. There are many thorns in every roses, despite the fragrance and beauty they bring. God made it so- so you can learn to render sacrifices when there's trials. Why are there trials? Because our humility is tested - to accept our faults and follies and learn to forgive and be forgiven. Love is so wonderful... if you continue to love each other for better or for worse, in health and sickness. Always try to patch things up before sundown. Don't allow self-pity. Remember you love each other, so be strong against temptations and trials. If you get angry at anything be soft to say it so that it shall not build up to be a wall against harmony. Never allow to forget to eat when hunger urged you to eat. Even if you have misunderstanding, don't use the grace of God - your food on the table - to wait till you're cool. Patch up at once- so that your immune system will be working well with your body and soul. A sick body is a sick soul. Always look at things in positive direction. Always Love God before anything. In everything, in every thought, in every decision - ask GOD for direction. Marriage is so wonderful but 2 must work for it.

Love,
Mom

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